I went out to see a play put on by an independent theatre company last night, and it was surprisingly good. I think the key to watching independent theatre is to have no expectations because you never really know what is going to be thrown at you - could be good, could be terrible. But, I was pleasantly surprised last night!
Something I've noticed lately... In spite of how well I think I know myself and how much thinking I do about life and who I am and how things are, it amazes me when people will tell me something about myself that I had never before even considered. And once I get over my astonishment or want to brush their revelation off, they turn out to be right about something I thought I had all the answers for. And it becomes clear that that was the truth all along.
And this makes me realise that I don't have everything sorted out in my life, I don't have all the answers... but I don't
want to have everything figured out. I want to constantly think and seek answers and seek knowledge and know that I don't know. I believe Socrates said something along the lines of "the unexamined life is a life not worth living."
Labels: thoughts
I spent the weekend up in Mont-Tremblant, which is a ski hill a lot like Whistler, for all you BC-ers. We stayed in a cottage peering over a frozen lake in a winter wonderland, wondered Tremblant village in the afternoon, and came back for cozy hot chocolates and movies by the fire in the evening. It was snowy and charming and magical. (And freezing cold!) I even had a real Quebec winter experience and ate maple syrup on snow! Yum. Perfect weekend.
This is my favourite photo of myself from the weekend... I love feeling the sun warming my face in winter... and look at that breathtakingly gorgeous view.
Labels: travel
Today for lunch, the boys at work were ordering in burgers. But not just any kind of burger, MASSIVE burgers. Well, I didn't know that at first, all I was told that these burgers were a Montreal staple and I
had to get one. I open up my takeout box and it looks like there's a pizza cut in 4 pieces inside. But NOPE. It's a GIANT BURGER. Wow. I had to get it photo documented, so here are some crappy pics from my cell phone:
I wasn't kidding. Those fuckers are BIG.
Labels: food
Feeling so much better from yesterday.
I love my weekly Skyping dates with my parents. It makes me so happy to talk with them.
I'm going to read
Catcher in the Rye again in memory of JD Salinger, who died today. I barely remember that book, I think I last read it in grade 8.
Getting super excited to go up to Mont-Tremblant with Lynds this weekend. And then it's NYC next weekend! Where else can I go next?!
I like it in the city when two worlds collide.
I've been having a really "off" day today. I woke up feeling really hungover-like, which was impossible given that I only drank 2 beers last night. So I chalked it up to just being tired, but that fuzzy-in-the-head and groggy feeling lasted way past the espresso I gulped down at work. I just felt grumpy and irritable and tired, and I even had waves of nausea and feeling faint. I didn't want to talk much or be my usual bubbly self, and it didn't let up all day.
I don't know why. It doesn't feel like I'm getting sick or anything. Maybe it's all of the emotions that are churning around in my brain right now combined with all the irritations I'm feeling at work. I
am feeling a lot of emotions right now, and I'm feeling pressure from a lot of things and people and I'm feeling pulled this way and that. Decisions and changes are happening. And I'm always so concerned with making the "right" decision, with pleasing everyone.
Which brings up this: on New Years Eve I had one of many amazing talks with Caitlin, and she told me something like, "You know, Maresa, I can't believe you don't blame anything in your life or how you are on your parents." And I remember looking at her and feeling shocked and at a loss for words. I remember thinking
of course I don't blame anything on my parents, why would I? Everything in my life and how I am is
my responsibility and
my doing.
But you know what? Who I am is half nature but also half nurture. I don't know why this never clicked with me before. Not that I'm looking to blame anyone for how I am, but I'm seeking to explain why. And it's because my parents put out the appearance that they're perfect. They have a perfect house, they have a perfect marriage, they make the right decisions, they never argue, they are always happy, they want me to be independent and perfect like them.
And so, here I am, concerned with making the right decisions, making sure I'm being independent, making sure to please them. I'm always cheerful, hardly ever show it when I'm in a bad mood, I make sure I have everything in my life under control. I try to make myself perfect too.
I want to stop feeling like I have to be in control of everything. I want to stop feeling like I have to make the "right" decisions. I want to do what I think will make me happy, and it may not be the best or smartest choice, and it may be impulsive and I may regret it later, but I can't keep trying to be perfect. I need to have days where I'm in a bad mood, and I need to feel like I can vent my bad mood feelings to people. I can't keep feeling like I need to please everyone.
I don't want to just feel things on the surface. I want to dive in. I want to feel the good and the bad. I want to get rid of the control. I want to be closer with my friends. I want to make irrational choices. I want to not be afraid of conflict. I want to find someone to love so much and feel like I can share all of this with them.
I just want to do whatever the fuck I want to do.
(Wow. Writing makes me feel a lot better.)
Labels: thoughts
So apparently my last blog post was not worthy enough for a blog entry, so here I am updating at 11PM when I should be going to bed, and I'm 2 beers deep from our hockey pool night tonight. Which, by the way, was a great success - we also completed our mid-season supplementary draft, so I now hope to soar from 5th place to 1st. Unlikely.
My new obsession is multigrain Life cereal. Holy mother effer it's tasty. I'm munching on some right now.
Strongbow cider doesn't exist in Montreal. Well, ciders don't really exist in Quebec at all. I mean, there's a few, but not many. I've been craving a nice Okanagan or Grower's cider (which I used to drink often in BC) for a while now, and last week I was on a hunt to find Strongbow cider. I went to 2 liquor stores, 1 grocery store, and 1 dep and couldn't find it anywhere! Actually, I couldn't really find a lot of cider selection in general, which made me sad. I ended up settling for Wild Vines flavoured wine-I-don't-even-know-what's-in-that-drink to drink last Friday night, which quickly brought my demise. Did not compare to a tasty Strongbow or Okanagan cider!
This blog post doesn't have a point. I'm going to bed now.
Labels: random
Jean Paul Gaultier Evian water still tastes like tapwater to me...Labels: photos
Spin me round again
I will never tire of listening to Clair de Lune by Debussy. I would really like to play the piano again.
Lazy Sundays. I actually got up at 8:30AM this morning to make it feel like my day would be super long... and to counter yesterday's lateness! I went out and got all my errands done this morning, and now I've brought a chair up to my window, and I am sitting next to the heater, looking out at the melting snow. Thinking and wanting to write.
I also want to bake. Nick and Karine gave me a belated Xmas present last week when I saw them - a cupcake cookbook! How perfect and cute is that... I am so excited to try out the recipes!
I can smell a hint of spring in the air... Feels like change coming.
Labels: random
Lazy Saturday brunch
What a beautiful, beautiful day today. (Well, I'll confess that my day didn't really begin until 2pm because that's when I finally forced myself out of bed - a little too much fun was had and alcohol ingested last night at the dance party! Amber and I had ambitions plans of going for brunch at 11AM this morning, but that clearly didn't happen!)
I digress - it was a beautiful day, the sun was shining with clear blue skies - it's been much too long since we've had a day like that. Also it was very warm (only -5) and a perfect day to wander around! Amber and I ate brunch at
Patati Patata, a tiny, tiny, 15-person capacity cafe with breakfast served all day and famous poutine. And cheap prices! My breakfast (egg, bacon, hashbrowns, beans, toast, fruit and coffee) cost $4.50! Amazing!
After our fantasticly late brunch, we wandered back down St-Laurent, stopping to check out vintage shops, jewelry stores, and Amber pointed out other amazing cafes and restos I needed to try. I've never had anyone do that with me - walk around and point out amazing places in my neighbourhood, and since she's lived in the Plateau for 5 years, it was so fun!
Montreal is such an amazing city, I never anticipated how much I would love living here. It has so much charm and appeal, more than I've felt from any other city in Canada... maybe it's the whole French thing too. Whatever it is, this afternoon I fell in love a little more.
Labels: food, montreal, plateau
So in a span of 2 days, I've become extremely addicted to podcasts. I listen to a little philosophy podcast on my bus ride to work in the morning, a photography podcast on the metro home, and a French podcast while I'm cooking dinner. You can hear me repeating phrases like "Maintenant, j'habite a Montreal" while I fry up a grilled cheese sandwich.
These little things are amazing - how had I never downloaded any before yesterday? What a fantastic idea to have a wealth of knowledge so easily accessibly on any topic you desire to download and listen to wherever you like! I am a big sucker for lifelong learning - I'm constantly researching new topics that interest me, and reading new books, and with these podcasts I don't even have to go to the library, all I have to do is click "download" and listen to someone's thoughts and ideas!
I imagine this is what people felt like when the first radios were introduced. I feel like a big geek, but it's so awesome!
To further illustrate how excited I am about podcasts, here is an email exchange between Lyndsey and I today:
On 10-01-18 4:02 PM, "Maresa" wrote:
Seriously podcasts are wicked. You know I’m obsessed because I actually felt sad that I can’t listen to a podcast right after work because I’m going to this movie with you. That is pathetic. It’s called human interaction, Maresa, it’s better than listening to podcasts!!On 10-01-18 4:09 PM, "Lyndsey" wrote:
Well if you’d like to go home and listen to some podcasts you can... otherwise you can listen to live podcasts, also known as conversations... between 2 people... you remember those, right?What can I say - I'm hooked!!! :P
Labels: geekdom
Spent this afternoon drinking café au laits and eating amazing almond croissants at
La Croissanterie Figaro. I love this little cafe, tucked in between tree-lined avenues in the Mile End area of Montreal.
La Croissanterie holds a special place in my heart because I used to live a few blocks away, and it was one of the first cafes in Montreal I ever visited. In fact, the girl I sublet my first apartment from recommended it to me, and on probably my second day living in Montreal, my dad and I went there for an early supper. I was immediately charmed by its European atmosphere and delicious food.
I have since spent many summer mornings on their terrasse eating their omelette croissant breakfast, or having afternoon café au laits, like today. Being there reminds me just how far I've come from being the wide-eyed fresh-off-the-boat girl in May to how I am now.
It is a lovely place to be.
Labels: mile end, montreal
All I do is party ah ah ah ah
I like to colour-coordinate my outfits to match my drink.
Love these girls! Can't wait for us to go to NYC! :)Labels: friends, parties, photos
Okay, it's time I stopped being a blogging slacker and updated this thing!
I saw my footage from my Tuesday "condo visit" and it was... mmmm... hilarious. Haha. No joke. I'm all "WOW, this place is so BEAUTIFUL!" and other amazing lines and truly fantastic acting skills. Also, I think I sound like a man. Anyway, my segment is about 30 seconds and I'm gonna be famous, bitchez! Haha.
Went out last night to a house party, lots of good times with good people! And some amazing photos, which I'll be sure to post... ;)
So yesterday and today feel like spring, I've heard people say. To me, it feels like BC weather - yesterday was all cloudy and foggy and misting rain. Apparently they don't get weather like that too often around here... well, it made me feel right at home! But seriously, the temperatures have been hovering around the 0 mark and it's been feeling so amazingly warm! Loving it! And I have to *knock on wood* because I'd like things to stay this way!!
Plans for today include going to the gym and then going over to Lyndsey's house to bring some food and snacks and happiness to cheer her up, and we will sit around and watch bad TV and it will be great!
Happy weekend, everyone! :)
Labels: friends, montreal, parties
Some photos from bowling on Friday night...
So I'm preparing for my acting debut tomorrow. Yeah you heard me. I'm gonna be a movie star! Err, a TV star, rather. For one of the TV shows we produce at work, they needed someone to act as a potential condo-buyer, so tomorrow morning I'm going under the bright lights of the cameras with a mic and etc (I don't really know how all this is done) to pretend to be a serious client and say intelligent things like, "So, what are the condo fees?" and "What's the building's occupancy rate?" Blah blah blah. All the while trying to sound like I know what I'm talking about and not giggle and look like a star-struck teenage girl. Think I can pull it off? Tune in tomorrow, folks...
Labels: friends, photos, work
I'm drinking a mug of homemade hot chocolate with Bailey's. There is never a time that isn't perfect for drinking this. Yum.
I found this beautiful little
online fashion booklet today and have been oohing and aahing at all the pretty pictures. Reeeeally makes me want it to be warm (or at least not snowing) so that I can dust off my camera and take lots and lots of photos of people and friends and fashion... oh so inspired! Let it be spring, let it be spring! This year is going to be a good year for my photography - I can feel it!!
Saw "Brothers" last night. That movie is depressing. True to form, I cried a lot. But the rest of the night was awesome - Lyndsey and I ate amazing sushi and cupcakes and sat around watching silly TV and I fell in love some more with her cat. Today was a day of cleaning and grocery shopping and laundrying and paying bills and all that other fun responsible adult stuff!
Lovely weekend, all in all. And I haven't killed my orchid plant yet!
Labels: fashion, movies
